I am writing this up in Grand Marais. I had planned to snowshoe out to where I wanted to scatter some of Barry’s ashes along one of my favorite mushroom-hunting trails. But I got the flu and couldn’t hike when I arrived. Now several days later, I am about to leave for home and rain has left the trail muddy and soft, basically impassible. I suppose I could try to hike in, but the day is grey and gloomy. It just doesn’t feel right to leave him out there on a less than glorious day. Oddly it feels good to have his ashes sitting safely beside me as I work at my table. Another happy hour with him won’t hurt. After everything, I wonder if I will even be able to scatter the ashes at all. I thought this would be easy, but it’s not.
Barry shared the ride back home with me, sitting in the front seat beside a Culver’s Butter Burger and fries Tomorrow I leave for California to visit my best friend and scatter some of Barry’s ashes in the ocean. I hope I can do it. Maybe it will be easier after one more happy hour with him tonight.